Exorcists vs Harlequins

Lockdown has been tough here in Seattle. I haven't done a battle report in months because of it. In fact, I think it's been three months since I've even played a game. It has been eating at me something fierce. Yesterday, my friend and I decided to risk exposure and attempt a game. I set up my table out in my driveway, lathered up in hand sanitizer and sunscreen, threw on a mask, and prepared to fight against Harlequins.

Fortunately it was a beautiful day. Almost too hot, even! I was worried for some of my resin models when the sun was at its highest.

The sun-scorched wastes of Zaharan VI.

I love setting up battlefields. I'd recently finished these desert buildings and I was excited to actually get to set them up. I took a page from Winters SEO's playbook and scattered aquarium rocks everywhere. We decided to play a Maelstrom game at 2000 points and jump right in after some face-to-face chatter (something I've also been missing fiercely).

A twist for my army! In the last few months I've been painting like crazy, but I haven't been painting Grey Knights. Instead, I've been reddening my brushes and painting up their only possible successor chapter. This is the blog debut of my Exorcists Chapter!

I really love these guys. I have about 3000 points painted, and so I scrounged up my favorite models to face against the Rillietann. It's a hodgepodge, but mostly good units. I have some Suppressors for long range shooting, some Infiltrators in case he decides to Webway Strike, Heckblasters to take care of bikes, a Xiphon Interceptor to also handle bikes, and just a ton of bolter fire. I've also got Inquisitor Felencia in there as my Warlord. I know that it is tactically a terrible call to make the Inquisitor the Warlord because then I don't get a free Space Marine relic, but with the lore surrounding the Exorcists it seems almost blasphemous for my Inquisitor to not be leading the force. I'll sacrifice tactics for fluff any day of the week.

As a non-First Founding Chapter, I utilized the Successor Chapter Tactics rules for my Exorcists. I gave them Warded so that they have a 5+++ against mortal wounds (which is on brand for them; their armor is covered in runes and glyphs), but I couldn't really decide on the second tactic. I ultimately went with Stoic (+1 Ld) to represent the fact that they are fearless and unshakeable. I think this was a bad choice. I would love to hear some recommendations for a fluffy option, if anyone has any ideas.

Too many bikes?

My buddy brought an absolute assload of Harlequin bikes. Each of those has those vicious haywire cannons that just tear through vehicles with mortal wounds. My Warded FNP was going to come in handy. Each Starweaver transport had five clowns with fusion pistols, as well, so he had a ton of damage output. He was utilizing the new rules from White Dwarf which give his six characters all sorts of new abilities--many of which were incredibly defensive.

Gorgeous models.

His Warlord was the Shadowseer on the left there, named Morrigan Fatedancer. If he played his psychic powers and stratagems right, he could give her a 9" bubble that made all his Harlequins have a 6+++ FNP and -1 to being wounded. Everyone talks about how Harlequins are glass cannons and they have to rely on a coin flip invuln save, but I think this was a good a way to give them some incredible survivability. As he told me this, I was really wishing I had brought along some snipers to take out Morrigan.

We rolled off, and I chose to be the Attacker. I was set to deploy first and go first, so I deployed accordingly. My plan was to rush forward with my Xiphon and my two Impulsors which were loaded with Heckblasters, Intercessors with a power fist, and my Primaris Captain with a power fist. I castled up all my shooting around Lieutenant Sennacherib and Inquisitor Felencia, with the intention of the Inquisitor giving one of my units a 5++ with her psychic power Power Through Knowledge and using Wisdom of the Ancients on my Contemptor Dreadnought to provide the reroll aura while my Captain was away. If all went well, I'd pop his transports and leave his fusion pistol Troupes back in his deployment zone while my firebase took shots at his bikes. My Tarantulas could easily pick off the Troupes as they rushed up the board.

Definitely too many bikes.

He deployed very aggressively. Morrigan Fatedancer is in the middle there, providing her defensive buffs to his entire army.

Then he seized the initiative.

Oof

My vehicles didn't stand a chance. I had banked on going first, and it cost me. Prepared Positions did nothing to prepare my light tanks against the storm of mortal wounds and AP-4 meltas coming their way. He erased both Impulsors and dropped my Predator to 1 wound with ease. The plethora of shuriken cannons ate away at my Xiphon's wounds as well, bracketing it much sooner than I wanted.

I did my best to salvage my position. Fortunately none of my models died when their transports exploded, so I pushed my Heckblasters and the Captain forward to try and take out as many bikes as possible before he erased what was left of my vehicles. Unfortunately I chose to overcharge, and all Harlequin bikes and transports have an innate -1 to being hit. Even with the Captain's rerolls I lost two Heckblasters, and also the Captain himself because I overcharged his plasma pistol for some fucking reason.

Dammit.

My inexperience with Space Marines became immediately evident. I don't know anything about this army! I should never have overcharged when I had a 1/3 chance to just kill myself! I have played nothing but Grey Knights for the past year. That and the unexpected seizing meant this was going to be an extremely uphill battle. Ugh. My Xiphon was still in the game, though, so I threw all his shots into one of the transports in the back with the hopes of popping it.

"Hitting on 3s..."

Hm. Well, alright, that one wasn't my fault, at least. If the Captain was still around, maybe this would have been different.

At the end of turn one shooting, I had only killed two bikes.

I rushed forward and got my Contemptor stuck in along side some Veterans. The deluge of attacks from Intercessors with the Veteran strat took out two more bikes, and the Contemptor felled another. So I'd killed five of eighteen bikes. He struck back and laid waste to my Space Marines in melee.

Turn two he didn't move much. His bikes shot apart my Intercessors on the right flank and prepared to charge my plasma boys.

All of the defenses protecting my commanding forces had been eradicated, and my Warlord was exposed.

The clown cars moved in and just began mopping up everything. The sky was full of bikes that couldn't be shot and just shot apart everything. I didn't have any way to effectively retaliate.

Impulse buying is healthy.

My forces were slaughtered. Warded helped a bit against the mortal wounds from psychic powers and haywire cannons, but it wasn't nearly enough.

"Oh fuck--"

Inquisitor Felencia took shuriken cannons to the face, and then Chaplain Acheron was incinerated by fusion pistols.

Blood on the sand.

By the end of turn two, my Dead Pile looked like this:

Which was easily most of my army. When my Terminators finally touched down on my turn, there was nothing for them to reinforce.

"Is this... did we show up to the right place?"

"Oh shit!"

"Oh, shit."

I cannot overstate how totally the Harlequins ruined me. It was a bloodbath. I think I only completely killed one unit the entire game. My one redeeming moment was when Khurshid, the Sergeant of my Veteran Intercessors, survived two fight phases against the coked-up psychopath that is the Solitaire known as the Whisper of Antioch. Khurshid just kept passing his saves, and managed to take off two wounds from the Whisper of Antioch before the Solitaire decided the fight wasn't worth his time and fell back on the next turn to kill something else. I consider that a victory for Khurshid.

I think I had two models on the table after turn three. We called it before the sun set.

What a lovely afternoon of cocktails, 40k, and sunshine. I don't even mind that I got thrashed like a chew toy. It was just so nice to play again and catch up with a friend. We managed to keep our distance from each other and wear masks the entire time. I think this was a successful experiment, and I really look forward to playing someone else next week. But, man, I need to do some more list crafting with my Exorcists.